sick friend model letter, sick friend sample letters, sick friend Whether it is a small illness or a serious one, beautiful encouragement words for a sick friend.
When someone you love is sick or going through a hard time, a get well gift can mean the world to them. But it can be hard to know how to help. We have compiled more than 100 great get well gift ideas to help you decide the best way to show you care.
1. Gift basket. Create the perfect DIY gift basket for any occasion by adding a package of items to read, watch, eat, wear, or soothe.
2. Gift card to favorite drink place. Whether your loved one is a Starbucks junkie or prefers Diet Coke, give the gift of a tasty beverage gift card.
3. Gift box. For a DIY gift box just for grandparents, think about including printed photos, a handwritten letter, and other sentimental items they can appreciate for years to come.
4. Teddy bears. Gift a teddy bear so your loved one will always have a cuddle buddy, or send a Get Well Soon Finger Puppet from Finger Puppets Inc. for something on the smaller scale.
5. Balloons. Add cheer to your loved one’s space with fun and colorful balloons.
6. Letters. Snail mail still has its merits, so get out your stamps and start writing.
7. Handwritten notes. Use some pretty note paper to make your letter extra special.
8. New blanket. Cozying up in a fresh new blanket is the ultimate comfort.
9. Aromatherapy candle. Smell is the strongest sense tied to memory, so your loved one will always associate this gift with your thoughtfulness.
10. Small plants. Choose a houseplant that requires little care for best results.
11. Bath bombs. Bath bombs or bath salts from Old Factory Soap are the ultimate relaxation technique to help your loved one unwind.
12. Shower sprays. For a relaxing, invigorating shower, try Travertine Spa’s steam shower spray.
13. Essential oils/Diffuser. Check out Frankie and Myrrh for ideas on how to cure any number of ailments with the help of essential oils.
14. Adult coloring books. Try gifting a beautiful version from Skyhorse Publishing.
15. New dishes. Eating will be even more enjoyable with beautiful new plates or bowls.
16. Bracelets/Jewelry. For an extra special piece of jewelry, consider a birthstone galaxy charm from Chamilia.
17. New journal. Your loved one may want to record this time of life in a nice journal.
18. Pen and pencil set. While you’re at it with getting a journal, consider adding a pen and pencil set to complete any get well gifts for her.
19. Photo album. Capture happy memories with a high-quality photo album from Album Envy.
20. Digital photo frame. Since printing photos is difficult in today’s digital age, upload them all to a digital photo frame and gift it to someone you love. Or, get the benefits of printing without the hassle by trying a photo printing texting service like NanaGram.
21. Decorative objects. If your loved one has an empty shelf in the house, add to the decor with a luxurious candle, unique sculpture, or other decorative objects.
22. Wreath. Your friend will love greeting guests with a cheery wreath in any season.
23. Comfortable clothing. When lounging around the house for long periods of time, your loved one will feel more comfortable in new sweats or pajamas.
24. Stuffed animals. Comforting stuffed animals are one of the best get well gift ideas after surgery.
25. Sleeping masks. Sleeping masks make for unique get well gifts to help your loved one get some much-needed rest.
26. A painting kit. Painting can be therapeutic when someone is feeling down.
27. Framed inspirational quote. Easily personalize a print with the help of Poster Haste.
28. Relevant holiday decoration. If it’s close to a special holiday, consider gifting seasonal decor.
29. Inspirational calendar. Help a friend get organized and feel inspired with a unique and motivational calendar.
30. Handheld massager. Offer the gift of relaxation with a handheld massager.
31. Warm/Fuzzy socks. Both a slipper and a sock in one, fuzzy socks are the perfect comfort gift.
32. Decorative rocks/stones. Offer a Loving Memory Garden Stone with a personalized message.
33. Netflix/Hulu subscription. Let your loved one have a TV show binge session with a Netflix subscription.
34. Playlist of new music. Your loved one will appreciate the time you spent crafting the perfect playlist on Spotify.
35. Aromatherapy face mask. Who wouldn’t love to hydrate their skin with a fancy face mask?
36. New pillow. Add a silk pillowcase from Sleeping in Silk for the ultimate comfort.
37. Meditation book. Bring a calming spirit to your friend’s life by teaching the art of meditation.
38. Box of aromatherapy soap. Choose a unique scent your friend will love!
39. Basket of household cleaners and sanitizers. Offer a basket of household cleaners to help them stay on top of the messes, and include some fancy products to help them enjoy the process more. We love toxin-free scented sprays.
40. Favorite magazines. Your gift will keep giving all year if you sign up for a magazine subscription on behalf of a friend.
41. Nice lotion. This is a great gift especially in the wintertime, when the air tends to be drier.
42. Incense. Bring in an exotic element with incense from around the world.
43. Fleece shawl or wrap. A girlfriend will love wrapping up in a cozy, wearable fleece.
44. Flowers. Flowers brighten a home and bring life to any room. Try your hand at DIY flower arranging to make the act even more thoughtful. And although flower are a classic gift, sometimes its nice to mix it up with something more unique.
45. Personal heater/heated blanket. If it’s a cold month, a heated blanket will be the best gift you could offer!
46. Favorite book/things to read. Pass on one of your favorite novels, or get creative with a personalized book for adults from I See Me.
47. Audiobooks. Audible has an amazing selection of books that can be downloaded in an instant.
48. Brain teasers, puzzles, & games. Try Alexa-connected travel board games for your ultra-techy friends.
49. Card caddy. For the more traditional non-techy folks try a card caddy from Narrows Hill.
50. Offering yard or housework help. Serve your friend by raking leaves or mowing the lawn.
51. Visit from a pet or animal. Don’t own a furry friend? Rent one for truly memorable get well gifts for him.
52. Nice pair of headphones. If you have a friend or loved one who is into music, pick a nice pair of headphones to give them an even better listening experience. Or you could even try a pair of SleepPhones from AcousticSheep to give them a better night of rest.
53. New ties. Ties are the classic gift for any man, even when they’re feeling under the weather.
54. Boxed coin set. Boxed coins are a great gift for someone who loves vintage items or history.
55. Movies. Keep your loved one entertained with the best new movie on demand.
56. Comic books. Bring a smile to someone’s face with a fun comic book.
57. Decorative mug. A golfer would love a mug in the shape of a golf bag from Golfbeermug.com.
58. Getting organized. You could give the gift of getting organized from Everything In Its Place, if your friend isn’t a big golfer.
59. Jar of hard candies. If your friend has a sore or dry throat, they’ll especially love sucking on some hard candies.
60. New slippers. Quality slippers will last for years and make your loved one think of you every time they wear them.
61. New filtration water bottle. Choose a great filtration water bottle for a fresh way to quench thirst.
62. Favorite movie or superhero shirt. Wax nostalgic by gifting a T-shirt referencing an old movie or superhero.
63. Book of jokes. Find a great book of jokes to lighten the mood, and you could even throw in a fake rat from Gifted Rat.
64. Smartphone handset: A Bluetooth-enabled banana phone will give your friend a laugh while they open it.
65. New watch. You’ll help your friend stay on top of the time with a new wristwatch.
66. Soft robe. Men appreciate a great, cozy robe just as much as women!
67. Backrest pillow. Ease back pain with this convenient pillow.
68. Lapdesk for laptop. Make working from home easier with a lapdesk.
69. Favorite movie character accessories. Pinterest has great inspiration on fun movie character accessories.
70. New fan. Help a loved one cool down with a quality standing fan.
71. Homemade care package. You’ll show extra thought with a unique package of goodies just for the person you love.
72. Custom song. Take things up a notch by creating your own song with the help of Your Song Maker.
73. Custom video. Try a get well video from Vidday to go along with the custom song.
74. Rice heating pads. Soothe sore muscles with a heating pad that can be made at home or purchased.
75. A meal with a movie. Whip up a homemade meal and add a Redbox movie to go with it.
76. Cross stitch. If you’re crafty, make a memorable cross stitch for them to display at home.
77. DIY manicure set. There’s nothing like a fresh manicure to lift someone’s spirits!
78. Knitted scarf or hat. Knit a hat yourself or buy a unique style online.
79. DIY pedicure. Give the perfect DIY gift for her with an at-home pedicure done by you.
80. Offering to walk dog or take care of pet. DIY get well gifts don’t have to be fancy—an act of service will work just fine!
81. Fabric bag filled with treats. Your loved one, friend, or colleague will appreciate the cute packaging in your DIY gifts.
82. DIY card kit with paper and stamps. Help pass the time by offering a fun craft activity.
83. Basket with medicine. Be sure to include hand sanitizer to stop the spread of germs as well. We love this bird-shaped hand sanitizer from Olika.
84. Decorated boxes of facial tissue. Freshen up your loved one’s space with a decorative tissue box cover.
85. Homemade bread and jam. Still looking for the perfect DIY gifts for him? This homemade classic will warm anyone’s heart and fill their belly.
86. Personalized thermos. Your loved one will appreciate the added touch of thoughtfulness when they see their name on their thermos.
87. Gourmet soup. Spoonful Of Comfort offers great-tasting soups that can be conveniently ordered online.
88. Candy. Give someone a high-end taste of the sweet life with ginger caramels from McCrea’s.
89. Tea. Pick out your favorite blend and deliver it with a nice mug. Or, if your friend isn’t a tea lover, try coffee beans from Eleva Coffee.
90. Cheese and crackers. Set up your own platter of assorted items from somewhere like Trader Joe’s.
91. Cookies. You could really make someone feel special with an extra special chocolate chip cookie recipe, made with love.
92. Ice cream. There’s nothing like ice cream to heal any ailment, and you can really impress your loved one by creating a custom ice cream flavor just for them with the help of eCreamery.
93. Fruit. Get creative and mail a microgreens growing kit from a company like Hamama, so your friend can have the ultimate satisfaction of eating something they’ve grown themselves.
94. Nuts. Nuts are a healthy and crunchy treat to keep anyone satiated and happy.
95. Tin of popcorn. Try Chicago popcorn for the ultimate cheddar and caramel combination.
96. Bottle of wine. Personalize the bottle if you really want to go the extra mile!
97. Personalized M&M’s or candy. Your loved one will be surprised to see their initials or a special note on their candy!
98. Baked goods. Chocolate chip cookies are one of the best ways to show someone you care.
99. Assortment of dried fruit. Gourmet dried fruit is a special treat anyone will enjoy.
100. Supply of favorite hot chocolate. If your loved one is a chocolate fan, offer a stash of unique hot chocolate flavors.
101. Favorite pop/soda. Present the soda in a fun basket or other unique presentation style.
102. European chocolate. Because Europeans just do it better.
103. Chocolate dipped fruit. Pick an in-season fruit and go to town!
Sometimes all someone needs to feel better is a kind word, note, message, or call from the people that support and love them: you. Here are four ways to send a get well message.
1. In-person: With digital communication so prominent in today’s era, checking in on someone in-person can mean the world. Whether you stop by their home, check in with them at work, or visit them at the hospital, talking with someone in person and wishing them well face-to-face can do wonders for lifting spirits and morale. People like family and close friends, in particular, will love to see a friendly face when they’re feeling down.
2. Phone call: Dropping a line to someone who isn’t feeling well is a quick and easy way to let them know you’re thinking of them and wishing them a speedy recovery. Consider phoning a family, friend, or loved one who lives in another city or whom you might not be able to visit in the near future.
3. Card: There’s never a bad time to send an old fashioned snail-mail card, especially when someone in your life is feeling lousy. Whether it’s a humorous get well card that’s sure to bring smiles or a thoughtful hand-written note letting them know you’re keeping them in mind, cards are a great get well message for everyone from close family members to neighbors and co-workers.
4. Email: Lastly, if you don’t feel comfortable stopping by, dropping a line, or sending a card, you can always turn to email as a way of your sending get well wishes. Email is Ideal for letting people like co-workers, distant relatives, neighbors, and acquaintances know you’re thinking about them, and is also a great tool for checking in on your loved ones throughout the recovery and healing process.
With plenty of options for cheering up those you know and love well, you might find yourself still at a loss as to what you should include in your get well message. The following prompts can provide you with guidance and inspiration for an array of different scenarios.
There are hundreds – if not thousands – of reasons to wish someone well. From inspirational get well messages to funny get well messages, below are four of the most common scenarios and ideas of content you can include in your message.
1. After surgery:
2. After serious illness like cancer diagnosis and treatment:
3. After serious illness like a heart attack:
4. After the loss of a loved one:
5. When someone is dying:
6. When you want to write funny get well messages:
Sometimes it can feel like everyone in your life is struggling with a loss, illness, or other unfortunate event. If you write a get card for one person, does that mean you need to write one for everyone else? And if so, what are you to possibly include in all of these messages? Who is it even appropriate to send these types of messages to?
Check out this list of different people you might want to include in your list of “appropriate get-well recipients”:
As a general rule of thumb, if you’re thinking of someone during their time of illness, recovery, or difficult times – let them know! You’d likely want to hear from the people in your life if you were in the same boat.
Now that you’ve read through our list, you’re sure to have found a great get well gift idea for someone you love. Whether it’s a get well gift, a Mother’s Day gift, or a present just because; you’ll warm their heart and soul with the thoughtful gift you choose to give, especially when it’s in the form of a comforting gourmet soup from Spoonful Of Comfort. If you found our article helpful or inspiring, spread the word and gift-giving spirit with friends and family.
Have some ideas to add to the list? Share them with us below.
Sample letters to offer sympathy in a case of serious or terminal illness. Until then, get well fast and please tell Ashley if there is something I can do to help.
the process of becoming fit and healthy again after an illness or injury
to become fit and healthy again after an illness or injury
if your body fights off an illness, it prevents the illness from making you ill
to get rid of something bad such as a problem, illness, or fear
if an injuryheals, the skin or bonegrows back together and becomes healthy again
to make someone become conscious or alive again
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if someone who has been ill or injured is given the all clear, doctorstell them that they are well again
well or successful again after being ill or havingproblems
to be very ill in hospital and likely to die/no longer very ill in hospital and not likely to die. The American expression is be on/off the critical list.
mainly literary if someone’s feverbreaks, it starts to become less severe
if your mind or headclears, or if it is cleared, it stops being confused, tired, or affected by something such as alcohol
if an illnessclears up, or if something clears it up, you stop being affected by it
if an injuryheals over, newskinforms over it and it becomes healthy again
if an injuryheals up, the skin or bonegrows back together and becomes healthy again
if a brokenboneknits, its partsjoin together again
to not die as a result of an illness or accident
if a bonemends, or if something mends it after it has broken, it grows back together and becomes healthy again
British to become well again after an illness or injury
if you are over an illness, a shock, or a badexperience, it has ended and you are no longeraffected by it
to start to get better after being ill or in a badsituation
to manage to stayalive after you have been very ill or very badlyinjured
if you rally, your healthimproves and you start to get better after being ill
to get better after being ill or injured
relating to your ability to get better after being ill or injured
to make you feel that you have more energy again, especially when you are tired or hot
to make someone feel or lookyounger or have more energy
medical a period of time when an illness or disease becomes less severe
to make someone feelhealthy again
to become conscious or alive again
often humorous to make someone feelbetter, or to startfeelingbetter
to give newenergy to someone or something
if an injuryscars over, it forms a scar as it becomes better
a feeling that you are no longer as tired as you were
if you throw off a slightillness, you become healthy again
to make your body, muscles, or skin more firm and healthy
This list of 25 best get well soon messages for friend that will let them know you are thinking about them.
Wishing you a speedy recovery dear friend. I pray to God that you feel better through each passing day. Hope you resume your normal life soon.
Having fun and enjoying happiness is not the same without you. Wishing you a speedy and full recovery from your illness.
Dear friend I want you to know that you are present in our prayers. We hope you can recover soon so you can be with us again.
You were always a tough person and I know that coming out of your illness will only make you tougher. I wish you a speedy recovery.
Your stay in the hospital is tearing me apart. You are always remembered in my prayers. Please, get well soon!
I’m eager to see you well again. Every day I pray to God to grant you sound health so you can get back on your feet soon.
I miss you so much and so does everyone else. We all miss you and wish you a speedy recovery. We especially miss your humor and your kindness. Take care and know that we are eagerly awaiting your return.
Get well soon, my friend. I am sending loads of good wishes for your fast recovery and good health. I wish for a very better health for you.
I send my best wishes for you to have a speedy recovery and do not forget that you can count with my help whenever you require it.
My prayer is that God will heal you miraculously from your illness so that we can have good times to share. Wishing you a speedy recovery.
Take this token from me, a basket full of love and happiness from someone so special to you. Dear, I wish you a fast healing from your illness and sound health for the remaining years to come. Please, get well soon!
Wishing you all the best with your recovery. And may you enjoy many more years with good health.
I’m missing you so much. Please don’t forget to take your medications as prescribed for you. I wish you a speedy recovery.
Your continue stay in the hospital has made everyone heartsick at home. I wish you a quick recovery so we can have fun together again.
My thoughts and prayers are with you during this horrible time. You’re not left alone and I hope to see you return to your healthy life soon. May God heal you soon and make you feel better to enjoy your life!
I was heartbroken to find out about your illness. I truly hope and pray that you get well soon and that you are back to your bright and bubbly self in no time.
Get well soon, my friend. Your absence makes me sad and I long to see you feeling better. Get well quickly because you are missed by so many. Take good care, take time to heal and know that many are praying for your speedy recovery.
I was heartbroken when I heard you were ill. I wish you a speedy and full recovery from your illness. Get well soon!
You are a great friend, with an innocent soul. We care for you a lot, and we are always there to support you. Take care dear and please get well soon.
Take this special gift from me, and I want to let you know that you are not alone on your sick bed. I wish you a fast and miraculous healing.
I wish you comfort, good health and happiness. Wishing you a fast recovery. May you enjoy sound health for many years to come!
Having you by my side everyday makes me happy. The more you stay in the hospital, the more unhappy I become. This is wishing you a speedy and full recovery.
If there is anything I can do to help, do let me know. Here’s wishing you a blissful speedy recovery, happiness, and good health to enjoy the rest of your life.
Your ill health has taken away our fun and happiness. We wish you were here with us and not on that sick bed that has kept you away from your friends and colleagues. We wish you a speedy and full recovery from your illness.
I wish to see you back to your normal health, my dear friend. I pray for your speedy recovery so that you can smile and be happy again.
I hope you enjoyed this great collection of best get well soon messages that will encourage your friends.
Wish this note will find you in good health and wellbeing. I am writing this note to you on knowing about your sudden serious sickness. I request you to make.
You know that feeling when you sit down and are writing a card to someone with illness or grief, a loved one who’s hurting? You’ve picked the *perfect* card, your pen poised over the smooth paper and, allofasudden, you just have *no idea* what to say?
This guide is for you. I’m Grace Quantock and I run Healing Boxes, a bespoke ethical gift box non-profit, designing gifts of support for people with illness, pain and in life crisis. I am also the founder of Trailblazing Wellness, where I teach and write about how to live well with chronic and serious illness. Oh, and I’ve lived with chronic illness myself for 13 years.
When I was bed bound and house bound for long periods, cards and letters became my medium of communication with the outside world, and I can’t overstate their importance. I’ve worked with thousands of people to design healing programs and wellness gifts that are *just* right, and I’m excited to share my experience today of what to say when writing a card to someone experiencing illness or grief.
It’s useful to differentiate between acute, serious and chronic illnesses. Sending a “Get well soon” card to someone diagnosed with a life limiting illness may not be as well received as one which simply acknowledges where they are now.
When I volunteered supporting children in hospice through sending cards/gifts, many people didn’t know what to say and just went with a generic “Get well soon” card. But it was hard for the child if they knew they may not get better, or didn’t understand why they were still ill.
We don’t want to instigate blame (it can be rife in the medicalisation of our bodies), or suggest even obliquely, that someone is being slow to recover.
Just never ask “Are you better yet?” or “Are you OK now?” because it’s horrible to be the one giving you bad news, and have to answer “No”. Rest assured, if they are recovered or in remission, everyone will know!
For someone with a short term illness, “Get well soon” can be perfect!
For someone with a serious, chronic or life limiting illness, sending your support at that time might be better.
Don’t expect a reply. They may want to reply, but they may have mislaid your card, or be too tired to get to the post office. They might have forgotten to reply, or thought they already have if cognitive dysfunction or memory problems are symptoms of their condition. I know I’ve done that before!
Let’s address it: too often cancer is not mentioned and for years it was called “after a long illness”. No more.
Don’t assume, don’t assume, don’t assume (the golden rule), and take your cues from the person you are writing to.
Wellness warrior Kris Carr takes the power away from the cancer by misspelling it on purpose – cancer becomes “canser”. If the person you are writing to is doing this too, why not join them?
Don’t mention people you know who died from cancer, or who had the same cancer, unless they are now happy, well and in remission with no evidence of disease years later.
Rather than starting with a question on health, such as “How are you?”, it can be a relief to be asked “How are things with you?” or similar. Let them tell you about their hobby, the red cardinal they saw, the TV show you both follow. It’s important to acknowledge the illness, but not bring everything around to it. It’s there, but they are still the person you know. The disabilities can be the footnotes and they are the adventure story.
Try offering emotional and practical support. Think about what you can offer, like collecting prescriptions, driving them to the hospital, sending them a card every week or month (or even every day if they are in treatment like chemo), walking their dog, dropping off their shopping once a week or similar. And then offer that as well as your support. Saying “Let me know if there’s anything I can do” is lovely, but it leaves the ball in their court. Then they have to think of what they might need done – which is hard when you are used to being able to do everything yourself. Then they have to try and work out what you might be able to do and actually bring up the courage to ask you. Exhausting.
If you make some offers, even if they aren’t exactly what’s needed, it allows the person to gauge what level of support you can provide.
Check out these helpful resources:
One of the kindest things you can say here is “No reply expected or required”. This is a gift as it takes the pressure off the recipient who, while loving getting a card, may already be feeling the obligation of replying (even just to thank you or to carry on the conversation) but they may be feeling too sick to do so.
Keep writing. Too often with chronic illness, after the initial “shock” of the diagnosis or accident when there’s a rush of support, friends and loved ones drift away. They’ve become used to the person being ill, they have started to move on with their lives without the person being as active with them as they were before. It’s all understandable – it’s exhausting to maintain a perpetual state of crisis, and it’s unhealthy. But while you are busy with your life, they may still be hurting, suffering, struggling and now lonely too.
Book a date in your diary to write to them monthly or weekly. Ask if they’d like chatty letters that don’t need a reply. Send interesting things with your cards – a leaflet from a park you visited, a post card of a painting you think they’d love from the gallery you attended, the orange or crimson leaf your child picked up in the park, a photograph from the school play.
Carry your card/letter with you and write to them while you are at the bus stop, the dentist’s waiting room, while you are waiting for brunch to be served at the café. You’ll be taking them to those places too in a very meaningful way, and you’ll be able to include details of what you see and where you are. A friend in your pocket isn’t just a social media app, it can be a letter too!
People used to include each other by post for many years. Letters are tangible, tactile ways to connect someone to the world. Let’s keep doing that.
A lovely, thoughtful gift would be to subscribe them to Pretty By Post or send them a package of Pretty By Post’s cards, because staying in touch with support networks is so important when someone has a chronic illness.
Often the thought of trying to dig out an appropriate card, or drag oneself to the shops to try and buy one, is overwhelming. It’s the same school of thought which says, if you take flowers to someone who’s ill, take them *with* the vase. Unless they are already in a vase, they can become a pain rather than a pleasure.
So send cards from you, and some cards to connect with others too. Can you throw a pack of stamps in yours? I think that would be sweet.
Connecting through cards is great for people with fatigue because you can write a little, pause and take a rest, come back to it on a better day, etc. It’s hard to pause and take a nap in the middle of a phone call. Visiting someone in person is great, but it can cost them lots of “spoons“, and the internet, with backlit, handheld, colourful, flashing, beeping devices, can be very draining and a hidden energy vampire. Offer another, more fatigue-friendly way to connect, like letters!
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Remembering means everything here. Having tests in the hospital can be scary, painful, confusing… and sometimes boring! People don’t generally go to the hospital because they are well and happy, so they are probably going to be hurting or scared.
If you know when they are due for the tests, send a card beforehand, send them vibes on the day of and send cards afterwards, while they are waiting for the results. You don’t want to overload them, just be there through the process.
You can ask if they’d like to keep getting cards with no need to reply. And ask what they want to hear about – do they want you to share details of potential new treatments you’ve read about? Do they still want to hear about your ski holiday if they can’t go anymore? Would they like news of your children if they’ve just lost a baby? The answer is individual. It might be too painful or they might need to hear it more than ever.
Sending poems and quotes that are strengthening or heartening may be welcome.
Check out these helpful blog posts:
Believe them. Remind them who they are, how you see them, reassure them that you still care about them and are going to support them through the journey of diagnosis and treatment. At the end of the day, a diagnosis is a label, something we put on a collection of expressions (or symptoms) the body is having. For some people a diagnosis is a relief, finally they have an explanation for why they feel as they do. It can be a day of celebration because now treatment can start, or they can begin accepting the way things are, now that they understand what’s happening.
For other people diagnosis can be dreaded, the label can feel like a punishment or a sentence.
Still other people see diagnosis as the Holy Grail and it’s hard not to have one. But ‘no diagnosis’ doesn’t mean ‘no illness’ or ‘no struggle’ and people without a diagnosis need support just as much as someone with one.
“When we ask ourselves which [people] in our lives mean the most to us, we often find… it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.” – Henri J.M. Nouwen
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Vulnerability matters here. We want your words to be empathic and congruent, but not make the recipient your grief counsellor.
It’s not their job to console you, and you can express your regret without overwhelming them. If this feels difficult, can you write a journal entry first? Write out everything you are feeling and then pick the parts you’d like to share with them. Deal with the feelings and fears the situation brings up in you. Grief and illness are parts of life we will all experience.
It’s important not to impose your beliefs on someone else, so don’t say things like “They are in heaven” unless you know the person shares that belief.
It can be most comforting to acknowledge how they are feeling without trying to fix it. It’s better to accept what they are feeling than try and chivy them out of it, or convince them to not be sad. So please don’t write things like “At least you have your children/family/another child” or “You are young, you’ll find someone else/marry again”. They wanted and loved this person.
You may be reading this thinking, I wouldn’t write that! But people do, often because they are grieving themselves or the magnitude of the loss scares them so they try and minimise it.
Do make sure to mention the person who died. Many people who have lost a loved one fear they will be forgotten.
Stay in touch, even if you feel awkward, even if you don’t know what to say. It’s better to be there and risk making a mistake, saying the ‘wrong’ thing and sticking through the friendship to repair it, than just disappearing.
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I hope this helps you to reach out to a loved one. I am wishing you good days, warm hearts and lovely letters.
Pretty By Post has made it really easy for you to be prepared with our Sympathy Curated Collection. Be sure to sign up for the PbP newsletter so you can get instant access to the resource library, which includes a pretty PDF version of this blog post that you can download. You’ll find other cool free stuff in the resource library like printables and worksheets, to help you stay organized and make it as easy as possible to send cards and spread love.
Grace Quantock is an award-winning international wellness expert, coach, author and motivational speaker. She is founder of Healing Boxes and Grace Quantock Trailblazing Wellness.
Grace is recognised as a trailblazer by thousands of people who have seen her speak and participated in her programs. She regularly guest tutors at universities and training programs and coaches clients internationally. Currently living – and thriving – with often debilitating illness, she knows, firsthand, the emotional and physical roller coaster that accompanies diagnosis and life struggle.
Awards include a Future Young Leader of Wales Award and multiple wins in the Great British Entrepreneur Awards 2015 (Social Enterprise and Eco categories). Grace is featured in The Times, The Huffington Post, Marie Claire magazine and Positive News and gave an internationally renowned TEDx talk.
Grace loves gardening, painting and she firmly believes that life is meant to be celebrated.
sick or recovering from an injury, use these get well soon messages to find you are less familiar with, you might begin your letter with “dear.